Thursday's I reminisce;

I'm going to write this blog just about random things that have been crossing my mind lately, so it will get jumbled and that's a promise.


First I never mentioned that I got a cell phone.
It's a really cheap one, but I only got it so I can text people.
I felt so out of touch with my friends because the only way they could talk to me was 1. online and I can't always be on and 2. my house phone but you can't call after a certain time and I'm usually not home anyway.
I plan on getting a better one when I get a job.
One that I can actually call people on.


Why do I even write this blog?
I ask myself that a lot.
I think there are two main reasons.
1. If I can't talk to Megan for a while she can see what I'm thinking.
2. I want to look back on this later and remember my life throughout the years.
There are some other theories I have but I like those 2 the best so that's all your going to here.


Lately I have been incapable of finding sleep.
For example right now it is 2:13 in the morning on a school day and I have no urge to go to bed.
In fact I have an urge to take a shower which I think I might do since I didn't do it earlier.
I just can't turn off my mind.
I think about the same things over and over again until I drive myself mad.

Shawn's death hit me.....hard.
Well, it's almost like it crashed into me.
The littlest thing will set me off now.
I can't talk to people the same way.
I feel like people are getting pissed at me because I'm not talking to them as much but I'm just dealing with a lot of hard things right now.

I can't remember what I was going to write in here because I had to stop and start again, so I guess that's all for now.